My teacher hates me and other school nightmares that students need to deal with

My teacher hates me, your son tells you after class one day. As a parent, how do you respond to that sort of statement? Whether the dust-up between student and instructor is a simple one-time disagreement, or something more insidious, it can create a real dilemma for the parent.

So, how does one go about solving it? Finding whether it’s a valid claim? Do you meet with the educator right off the bat?

In the coming paragraphs, we’ll take a look at ways in which parents should behave in order to find out all the facts, first. Various lines of communication will need to be opened up; from the parent to the child, parent to the instructor, and eventually — if things don’t get better — from the parent to a principal.

Questions to Ask Your Child

From PBSKids.org, here are a few questions for your child if they’ve come to you questioning why their instructor dislikes them:

• Are they the only one being mistreated; or it the type of educator who takes it out on the whole class?

• Is the instructor’s anger aimed solely at you for reasons you don’t understand; or have you been misbehaving (handing in homework late, talking in class, etc.)?

• Are you working up to your potential?

• Are you more sensitive than other students?

• Is the educator acting this way all the time? Or is just a once-in-a-while occurrence?

With these questions, the two of you can begin to understand what may be causing this rift in the classroom. Educators, like the rest of us, can have bad days. It’s important to explain to your child that teaching can be a difficult profession.

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New educators can have problems dealing with students early on; as well, older instructors may have difficulty dealing with changing times, new clothing styles, and new attitudes. Or, instructors may just have issues with particular types of students.

Whatever the case may be, it’s important to understand the situation and let cooler heads prevail.  Glean all the pertinent facts before taking the next steps.

How To Solve the Issues

After speaking with your child and assessing the situation, a parent should:

• Get involved with school life: visiting the class, chaperoning trips, etc. To do this might alleviate some of the tension between the student and instructor. It shows the parent is taking an interest in their child’s education and looking to “fix” things

• Set up a conference/meeting with the educator; don’t start off angry and try not to accuse them of anything. Work with them to figure out ways in which the child’s experience can be more positive

• You may call up other parents of students in the class to find out if they’ve ever had any problems with the instructor; sometimes it will amount to nothing and in other instances there will be further complaints from kids in the classroom

• Having done all this (and still having problems), it’s time to bring in the principal of the school

The principal will know proper protocol and — in many instances — a school counselor will get involved. For many cases, the counselor will assess the situation, and if there is no improvement, will ask that the student be moved to another classroom. 

In addition to student vs. instructor, concerns with bullying, presentations, work load, peer pressure, and more, may add to pressures felt by the student. In the end, it is about communication, though.

So, my teacher hates me. Well, let’s ask questions and take a moment to breathe. When you can understand where your child (and the instructor) comes from, it can be easier to take action — The right way.

Resources:

Parenting.com: My Teacher Hates Me!

PBSKids.org: My Teacher Hates Me: You vs. Your Teacher.

Above photo attributed to Indri Rizal